the sick life

Unfortunately I have received the sad news that Billi has decided to close junkylife. I want to thank him for making the best project of its kind anywhere and I hope he is doing well and wish him luck in whatever he is doing. Thanks a lot for everything you’ve done for me and everyone else over the years. It has been a fun ride. This life I’ve been living with narcotics among other drugs has been going strong for nearly a decade and while junkylife may be finished my life as a junky is still continuing. Also, I know I haven’t posted since December but I have been writing I just haven’t gotten the chance to post it yet. To give you a preview of my stories to come they involve me moving in with a very “special” lady, becoming a farmer of sorts, and more of my take on the death of the American empire from a libertarian perspective. If you wish to continue reading my blog the new address is now http://thesicklife.wordpress.com

Time went by and time still goes by. Sometimes it goes by fast and other times painfully slow, depending on whether I dosed or was sick. I started doing electronics and computer work for people as a way to get some extra cash. When I’d get really low on money I’d use my Gibson guitar as collateral for methadone and dilaudids. Unfortunately my dealer ended up moving about an hour away so now it meant no more collateral and that I’d have to start planning 2 or 3 visits a month instead of being able to just walk across town any time, any day. It wasn’t easy or cheap to maintain a steady diet of methadone, dilaudid, morphine, amphetamines, Ritalin, cannabis, alcohol, and an array of other drugs (on occasion). Then again, it wasn’t particularly hard but it’s never fun or easy being sick.

The CES turned out to be an excellent addition to the routine. Luckily my friend gave me some electrodes they had gotten a few years back for their TENS unit and it worked perfect for my CES unit. I’d turn it on before taking a dose or when I started feeling really sick. It definitely makes you nod harder, several times I fell asleep only to awaken hours and hours later to find the electrodes lying on the bed. No wonder it was originally called electrosleep. So far my anecdotal evidence seems to confirm studies that suggest it to be a good potentiator and withdrawal aid. I would like to build some for other people to see what results they get with it.
Another interesting device I came across was a nebulizer. The only problems I’ve had was getting the right concentration and amount of water to use. It seems to work good though, I’d say definitely better than snorting for some drugs.

It pisses me off that people are on the ban salvia bandwagon. We need to organize and stop this. I suspect there will be less research into salvinorin analogs if it becomes illegal. If the claims made about the salvinorin analog herkinorin are true and it doesn’t get studied further that will be a tragedy. At least the states are banning it instead of one federal ban. I wrote a letter to the editor supporting keeping salvia legal a while back but I doubt they published it.

My friend in the army had retired and was finally out of the service. He was bordering on becoming addicted again but most of the time he just stuck to pot and alcohol. One night at his house I met a girl who had a script for focalin. She gave me some for free and sold me the rest of the bottles for pennies a piece. I think I prefer it to Ritalin but just a bit. Focalin is d-methylphenidate, while Ritalin is the racemic mix of 50% dextro and 50% levo methylphenidate; similar to how Dexedrine is pure d-amphetamine while adderall is a racemic mix of both isomers. In fact both Dexedrine and Focalin are twice as strong by weight as their racemic mixes.

Well I’m winding down, need to wait about a week for the methadone to be available more frequently again and for my Ritalin to get filled. I’m out of pot which Is no big deal but pot Is always nice to have. So for now it seems I’ll have to work with my 40mg of methadone, 20mg of hydroxyzine, and my CES unit.
Oh by the way check out www.ronpaul2008.com

Things have been going pretty good. Pretty stable with methadone lately but financially I’m always broke. Being broke doesn’t really bother me; it just means I have to live simpler. I’ve been really busy working on various CES circuits and when I finish the second one I’m working on today I plan to start working on LED dreamachine glasses and an EEG machine. Once I find the best CES device I will offer some in return for a “donation” (aka cost of parts’). Wetware hacking is becoming my hobby. I’ve been thinking about going to college for electronics or nanobiotechnology but I’d need to find a campus close to a methadone clinic. I would like to get my hands on a new synthetic opioid that is a salvinorin analog, it is called herkinorin. Allegedly it does not cause tolerance or addiction/dependence because it does not induce receptor internalization or beta-arrestin interactions. Since salvia is not controlled herkinorin would not be controlled either. I’ll try and post more on the next dose.

There is a technology known as Van Eck phreaking which allows a person to see what is on TVs, computer monitors, etc. Anything with a CRT and LCD monitors are vulnerable too. You can make your own Van Eck phreaking device, called an EckBox very cheaply. How an eck box works is that it uses an AM radio receiver to pick up the electromagnetic radiation that leaks from all monitors and TVs and converts it into audio signals. These audio signals are fed into your computer running the eckbox software and converts the audio signals back into video. If done right it is possible to pick up signals from up to 5 kilometers away but I expect that an average device only works up to a few blocks away. The eckbox project can be found at http://eckbox.sourceforge.net/ and if you want to know more just google Van Eck Phreaking or TEMPEST.

Now on to fucking with wiretaps. Most if not ALL wiretaps used in the US rely on two C tones played at the right frequency while your phone is on the hook. This is so that it does not record hours upon hours of dial tone. When you pick your phone up off of the receiver the c tones stop and the device begins to record. If you would play a loop of these c tones during a conversation in the background (it doesn’t have to be loud just loud enough to be heard on the phone line) the wiretap will think your phone is still on the hook. Another fun thing you can do is create false calls by playing the ctone, calling someone, turn the ctone off and dial another number. They will now believe you have called a number that you haven’t really called. If you want a clip of the mp3 and some links that prove this works check out: http://www.jetcityorange.com/wiretap-C-tone/

Right now I am building a Cranial Electrotherapy Stimulation device which delivers up to 800 microamperes of electricity to your brain through electrodes placed behind the ears. It has a long history of safe use, in fact there really isn’t anything bad that it does. CES has been proven to increase endorphins and raise levels of dopamine, serotonin, and norepinephrine. A feeling of euphoria and lightness can be expected after using CES. It is approved for use in depression, anxiety, insomnia, and even drug addiction. There are studies that show using CES can be effective for some people who are withdrawaling from narcotics. It is also said to potentiate drugs which work on the CNS, so I believe this could be a new tool for potentiating opiates and perhaps for getting off of opiates. If you want to read more about CES check out http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cranial_electrotherapy_stimulation and if you want to build your own CES device check out http://www.redcircuits.com/Page19.htm

Right now I’m kind of sick, having trouble getting to sleep and since my fentanyl patch wore off two days ago all I’ve had to hold me over till tomorrow is 200mg of propoxyphene, but at least I feel good enough to type. Maybe tomorrow I’ll write a decent entry.

Hey I should be adding a post very soon. Plus I’m going to try and make a habit of writing frequently again. Sorry I haven’t been sticking to this lately, there has been a lot of shit going on but I guess that’s always the excuse. I put shit off too much, I need to change that. Anyways, go check out A Scanner Darkly if you haven’t already.