Seedless

It was mid-day, mid-summer, sometime in the mid-1990’s…

You could see the Chicago heat rising like a blurry gas.  I was just plannin on kicking it around and actually not scoring today because I had some surplus to wake up to and to carry me thru the whole day leaving no reason to go outside, let alone leave my house, shit heroin was my life I fucked it for a decade and a half but the last time it fuct me, but it this way heroin is not like a perky breasted 21′ish year old ; ) .  No need for cruising ghetto corners…  Rocks, Blows, Park.  2 for $10 After dark.  A saying that often haphazardly gets caught in my head like a TV jingle.  How addicted to addiction was [am] I?  All I can say my life is rather plain, I like watching the cold scattered rain.  Onward Ho White Pony, Neyyyyyyyyy  Neyyyyyyyy…. ???  Dont Ask.

So I get a phone call asking if I would ride with some chick to help her score plus a few free bags and a crack smoke down, riiiinnnnggg Class is in Session, a tweaker session.  Being the junky I was it was a simple equation, soon we were passing past Harlem, Cicero, in our own quiet ritualistic dope buying behavior, the radio turned down, I take the driving over, I make sure my cooker, rig [filled w/ water], and cotton are ready for immediate use.  Sitting right next to my crack tube ready to snap, crackle, and pop.  The ‘normal’ occurs we score dope I get high, smoke some rocks get tweaked out, yell at the chick for not driving carefully, all while nonchalantly looking out the side view mirroor desperately scanning the traffic behind us in between letting the pipe cool down.  I was always positive, that there was a cop closing in and following us ready to pounce on my sickly and emaciated frame.  So sick, a robot that was vicious when his powdered fuel would run low in his system.  Systematic addiction, crystal clear no if’s, and’s, or but’s [but just one more bag…] manically roaming the city in search of hard drugs shit any drugs.  I always had a stash of tons of pills, pot, EMERGENCY heroin packet that what used in a ER funtion almost daily.  I wanted more, I wanted stronger, faster, stronger, more, never enough, well occasionally ; ).  So we pull out of the ghetto and on to the expressway I have already have a couple bags coursing thru my bloodstream as I finger the loaded glass pipe in my hand waiting for the right time to rip the fuck out of it.  We switched back driving positions so now she is driving her car again.  I sit and smoke rock and stare out the window, listening to her mindless babble. Yadda. yadda. yadda…  So she starts asking me to shoot her up as she has a hard time hitting a vein while behind the wheel, if you cant shoot dont shoot I always said and I rarely hit anybody [IV, for all you idiots] while they are driving unless it was a good friend, or I was confident on the persons tolerance level and if/and/or what other drugs or pharmies the person was on.  Well this chick was part of the pack, the typical girl.  The come in all sizes and shapes, but I would prefer to fuck the skinny, nice tits, etc. but I would cop dope with anyone.  I knew this girl thru a fellow junky and he was a good friend and she would always be available to drive me to score if need be but the best part of this one [well there were more than one] was that she would buy me dope.  Free Heroin how could you turn that down being a slave to that white heroin. 

TIMEOUT GOTTA GO

Continue Later… 

Peace,
Seedless

Re-Continuing

So we pull onto the expressway I do my shit, she does hers, eventually it gets to the point about her not being able to hit herself, oh god who are you and why did you do or probably still do drugs.  Accident waiting to happen and he bickering finally got to me and I snapped FINE I will fucking hit you how much dope is in here? Knowing she was going to lie.  High Low who knows, its all a ignorant lifestyle, you breakk morals like your back in 1986 pullin a back spin, break-dancing or some wacked out shit.  So grudgingly a fragment of a nightmare was a waking moment, I rinsed out her rig and cap’d it and by the time I was done I noticed the car lunging forward with speed, what the fuck.  As I turn and look up at her her head is flopped back onto the headrest, she has a slight smirk on her face, which made something click some where, why I dont know but it really didnt matter because the click never occurred, follow me?  GOD , FU*& ME WHAT THE HELL<  ()#% LJAL !!!!!  Wake the fuck up, shaking her and tryoing to get what little consciousness to rise up from her, it wasnt happening as we are now barreling down the highway at 85mph or so.  Thank the lord it was an old school buick with the front seats with no divider except the movable arm rest.  Did I mention this chick for sure outweighed me, so now I have to slide over kick her foot off the gas grab the wheel, watch her, slow down and change 3 lanes and pull over on the shoulder.  At this point I got her back breathing and promtly starting ranting about how she almost killed us and I told you so, blahblahblah…  She is clueless and almost swings the drivers side doors right into open traffic, I puull her across the seat with her giggling, than asking whats so funny.  WHAT THE FUCK?  I jump over and take the wheel it was like an Emergency pit-stop for ER OD victiums, we would have won the race if it happened.  I drove home silently for about 10 minutes while letting what happen sink in on her.  Than I let her have it again.  Never again did I score with that girl [I might have who knows, its all a blur this was probably just somenight mare that took place in a heroin nod in my bed, shrug, smile.  So thats that story, short and to the point not very detailed as I didnt have the strength to write much on the computer these days, there is nothing like a fine pen and some nice paper.

So there was one of my hundreds of skirting death possibly events…  I will try to write about a feeew others soon, till than…

Peace,

SEEDLESS